In Memory of My Mom

The Date is May 26th, 2016 and it is the 2 month anniversary of my mom's death and her passing from the hardships of this life into the heavenly glories waiting all those in Christ. As I was thinking about writing an update for the blog about what has been going on over the past few weeks with our family and Hearts Redeemed Ministry, I decided to rather include the talk I gave at my mom's funeral. I have decided to do this because I do not only want to remember the joy I have when I think of my mom and how much she loved her family, but I also want to share with you the reason why our family is living and ministering full-time in Thailand. It is the hope found solely in the gospel of Christ which is able to comfort and help those who are dying or have lost someone to death. The reality is that all of us fall into those categories because we are all dying and those around us are dying as well. Death will come for all, but only those in Christ will overcome the horrors of death with the hope of heaven. So as you read through the talk I shared during my mom's funereal 2 months ago, please take some time and reflect on your life and look to Christ, for it is in Him alone that those who are facing the hurts of death, can find hope in the eternal joy and peace given only in the life of Christ. (In the printable newsletters tag, there is a short family and ministry update from the past few weeks)

Greetings: Welcome to the memorial service of Dorothy Lucinda Rutledge who has blessed all of our lives in more ways than we can list and will be greatly missed. On behalf of her family I would like to thank you for your gifts of kindness and condolences which you have offered during this difficult time and we want you to know that we will be eternally thankful for your love for us and most importantly your love for our friend, our sister, wife, mother and grandmother Dorothy. We are grieved at her passing but we are also grateful that she is in heaven where the pains of this world can no longer burden her. 

Eulogy:

Dorothy Lucinda Dillon was born on September 28th, 1948 in Pocatello, Idaho. She was the youngest child of Paul & Mary Elizabeth Dillon, her siblings are Teresa, Margaret, James, and George. Dorothy graduated from Pocatello High School in 1966 and went on to complete her nursing education at St. Anthony Mercy Hospital in 1968. She married Kyle Leslie Rutledge on June 7th, 1969, at Pocatello, Idaho and moved to the Wood River Valley. Dorothy worked as a Licensed Practical Nurse over the years in Sun Valley and Hailey, Idaho. She and Kyle had four children, Catherine, Daniel, Dawna and Joseph and 8 grandchildren. In 2000 Dorothy and Kyle left the Wood River Valley and after a couple years in Pocatello, they moved to Caldwell. Dorothy and Kyle enjoyed traveling to Thailand to visit three of their children and grandchildren. Dorothy enjoyed nursing, Women’s Aglow Fellowship, camping, sewing, flowers, praying and giving words of encouragement, teaching her grandchildren to bake & how to be great crafters. She loved her Lord, her husband, her family and her friends.

Introduction: Charles Spurgeon said, “A good character is the best tombstone. Those who loved you and were helped by you will remember you when forget-me-nots have withered. Carve your name on hearts, not on marble.”

This morning we would like to take some time to remember and reflect on the precious life of my mother who lived her days her on earth with a great love for God and a genuine love for others. I was grateful that I was able to spend the last few days of my mom’s life with her, and was humbled to see that even in the most painful times during her fight with MRSA, she still was more concerned for the care of others than for her own comfort. For those who know my mom can also attest to her faithful love for others which was only possible because of her firm love for God.

As a family we are going to offer those who too have been touched by my mom’s love an opportunity to share briefly your memories of my mom and also any words of comfort you would like to share with her family during this time of mourning. Before I invite others to share though, I would like to take some time and reflect on some truths which my mom taught us kids not only during her life but also during her final hours before her death. I cling to these truths and daily seek to share these truths with others, because they are not only life giving but also lasting as they are recorded for us in God’s perfect Word, the Bible.

I want to begin by reading 1Thessalonians 4:13-5:3. In this we see three truths which not only my mom lived out in her life, but also are truths which God has written for our instruction and warning. Those truths are that the Hurt and Horror of Death are real for all of us. But the second truth is that there is also Hope and Help offered in the Life of Christ. The third truth is that we all must Hurry because He is calling. Let’s take a few minutes and look at these three truths in light of not only my mom’s death, but also the way she lived her life.

The Hurt and Horror of Death: In verse 13 we read, “…so that you will not grieve as do the rest who have no hope,” This does not say that we do not grieve those who die, because we see in John 11:33-35 that Jesus wept.  “When Jesus therefore saw her weeping, and the Jews who came with her also weeping, He was deeply moved in spirit and was troubled, and said, ‘Where have you laid him?” They said to Him, “Lord, come and see.’ Jesus wept.” Also in Romans 12:15 we are told to, “Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep.” When someone dies, it is not only ok to weep, but it is a key part of the grieving process which is helpful for hurting hearts which are healing.

There is a hurting which accompanies death and it is alright for us to care and cry for those who have died. It was both my mom and dad who taught me that it was ok to weep for those who have passed; I can still remember watching my mom cry on the phone and offer comfort to her sister following the passing of my cousin. I am grateful that my mom taught me about the hurt of death and during the last few hours we spent with her before her passing, I saw the tears in her eyes as she too wept knowing that soon she would leaving us. Death hurts and it is right to grieve and as Ecclesiastes 3:1-2 tells us, “There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven—A time to give birth and a time to die; A time to plant and a time to uproot what is planted. A time to kill and a time to heal; A time to tear down and a time to build up. A time to weep and a time to laugh; A time to mourn and a time to dance.”  My mom also taught me that there is a Horror of Death, and that horror is that we all will die one day. Death is not racist, sexist; it does not care if you are rice or poor, young or old, or even healthy or sick. Death is coming for all of us and none of us know the day or way in which we will pass, but we all know that we will die. The Bible tells us why death is a certainty for all of us, in Romans 6:23 it says, “For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Therefore those who sin will die, but what about those who have not sinned? In Psalm 14:1-3 we read, “The fool has said in his heart, ‘There is no God.’ They are corrupt, they have committed abominable deeds; There is no one who does good. The LORD has looked down from heaven upon the sons of men To see if there are any who understand, Who seek after God. They have all turned aside, together they have become corrupt; There is no one who does good, not even one.” Also Romans 3:23 says, “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”. Since we all are sinners, there is Horror in the certainty of death because following death is judgement. Hebrews 9:27 warns, “And inasmuch as it is appointed for men to die once and after this comes judgment” and also 2 Corinthians 5:10 tells us that, “For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may receive what is due for what he has done in the body, whether good or evil.” That is the Horror of death, not that it is coming for all of us but that following our death, we must face the righteous judgement of God for all of our deeds, and as Isaiah 64:6 says, “For all of us have become like one who is unclean, And all our righteous deeds are like a filthy garment; And all of us wither like a leaf, And our iniquities, like the wind, take us away.” So even our best deeds are worthless in light of Gods holiness and in light of that death is truly the ultimate Horror show, for all of us are guilty and all of us will not only die but face judgement for our sins.

My mom was the one who taught me many things; she taught me how to read and write, she taught me how to cook, how to wash dishes, how to do my own laundry, and even how to clean the bathroom. She taught me many other things but the most important thing she taught me was that death is final and something to fear if you were not saved into Christ and His perfect life. She was the one who sat with me and explained the Gospel to me and how God offered hope for not only the hurt but also the horror of death.

That brings us to the second truth which is that there is Hope and Help in the Life of Christ who not only comforts those who are grieving but also has conquered the grave and the power of death. In 1 Peter 1:3-5 we read, “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His great mercy has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to obtain an inheritance which is imperishable and undefiled and will not fade away, reserved in heaven for you, who are protected by the power of God through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.” Also in Romans 8:10-11 there is the hope that, “If Christ is in you, though the body is dead because of sin, yet the spirit is alive because of righteousness. But if the Spirit of Him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, He who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through His Spirit who dwells in you.” And Jesus Himself assures us in John 14:1-6, “Do not let your heart be troubled; believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father’s house are many dwelling places; if it were not so, I would have told you; for I go to prepare a place for you. If I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself, that where I am, there you may be also. And you know the way where I am going.” Thomas said to Him, ‘Lord, we do not know where You are going, how do we know the way?’ Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father but through Me.”

There is hope found in the Gospel and the Life of Christ that the Grave can be overcome and the power of death broken. Those who are in Christ do not need to fear death, but rather rejoice in their passing from the temporal pain of earth to the eternal promises of heaven. Revelation 21:3-4 paints a picture of that heavenly paradise. “And I heard a loud voice from the throne, saying, ‘Behold, the tabernacle of God is among men, and He will dwell among them, and they shall be His people, and God Himself will be among them, and He will wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there will no longer be any death; there will no longer be any mourning, or crying, or pain; the first things have passed away.’”

My mom as I said was the one who kneeled with me as I confessed my sins and admitted my need for a savior. She was the one who prayed with me as I accepted Christ’s atonement for my wickedness and asked for God’s forgiveness for my wrong thoughts, words, and actions committed against Him and others. It was my mom who hugged me and welcomed me into the family of God and also the one who helped me walk according to God’s commands by providing ways for me to learn about the Bible, praying for me and my siblings that we would live out the teachings of the Bible, and proving to be an example of someone who loved God and loved others. This is the best gift my mom has ever given me, a hope for a new life in Christ and help in living out that life for God’s glory. It has been almost 40 years since that day when I asked Jesus to be my Lord and Savior and since then my mom has always been there to pray for me and provide opportunities for us to share the great news of the gospel with others.

Even during her last moments here on earth, we were able to pray together and witness to the medical staff who were attending her of the power and promise of a new life found in Christ alone. We grieve her death, but we are also rejoicing that her struggle here on earth is done and that one day all who are in Christ will join her in Heaven and celebrate the victory over death and pain because of the Hope and Help of the perfect life of Jesus Christ which we celebrated this past Sunday on Easter. As 2 Timothy 1:10 says, “but now has been revealed by the appearing of our Savior Christ Jesus, who abolished death and brought life and immortality to light through the gospel.”

The third truth which I learned from my mom as she lived her life as a follower of Christ and also during her last moments here with us is that those who do not have a saving relationship with God through Christ must HURRY because your days are numbered and death is coming quickly. There is nothing certain in this world, we can make plans but no one knows for sure what each day has to offer. In James 4: 14-17 we are warned, “Come now, you who say, ‘Today or tomorrow we will go to such and such a city, and spend a year there and engage in business and make a profit.’ Yet you do not know what your life will be like tomorrow. You are just a vapor that appears for a little while and then vanishes away. Instead, you ought to say, ‘If the Lord wills, we will live and also do this or that.’ But as it is, you boast in your arrogance; all such boasting is evil. Therefore, to one who knows the right thing to do and does not do it, to him it is sin.” Death is like a thief which comes when no one is expecting and will leave before anyone is alert to his presence. Tomorrow is not granted to us and so let us not wait to turn to God and find assurance in the hope of a new life offered only in Christ. Our plans for these 2 months in the States did not include speaking at my mom’s funeral. We had planned to visit friends and supporters, and to also spend lots of time with my family, but all those plans changed last week when my mother was admitted into the hospital one last time. I did not know my mom was going to die and neither did she. So I urge you to please HURRY and turn to God and find the comfort of the victory of death found only in the life of Christ. John 3:16-17 are verses we are familiar with but it is there to show us why Christ came to this earth, “For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. For God did not send the Son into the world to judge the world, but that the world might be saved through Him.”  Christ came to live and die for us so that we would not have to perish under the penalty of sin, and so that we can experience the gift of eternal life. Christ Himself says in John 11:25-26, “I am the resurrection and the life; he who believes in Me will live even if he dies, and everyone who lives and believes in Me will never die. Do you believe this?” Do you believe this? He is calling to you and wants you to receive the gift of life which is found in Him alone. John 5:24-25 says, “Truly, truly, I say to you, he who hears My word, and believes Him who sent Me, has eternal life, and does not come into judgment, but has passed out of death into life. Truly, truly, I say to you, an hour is coming and now is, when the dead will hear the voice of the Son of God, and those who hear will live.” Christ is the only way to heaven, Jesus claims this in John 14:6 where he says, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father but through Me.” Jesus is not only the way to heaven but He is calling you to join Him and those who do go to Him will not be turned away and will find rest for their weary souls, “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and YOU WILL FIND REST FOR YOUR SOULS. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”

My mom taught me the importance of turning to Christ and trusting in His life so that I can live mine with the promise of peace with God and the assurance of life after death. Throughout my life I have been blessed to travel the world and share the message of the gospel to countless people from different tongues, tribes, and nations, but it was my mom who first demonstrated for me the importance of sharing the gospel and even though she never went to as many countries as I have, she still faithfully prayed for and proclaimed the message of hope with those who God brought into her life. She spent years praying for family, friends, work mates, neighbors, and even her grandchildren. Praying that they would receive the gift of the new life in Christ and live without a fear of death and judgement. She lived her life telling people to hurry and come to God because He is calling, and she spent her last waking moments here on earth doing the same. The last night I spent with her before she passed, she kept on saying “Hurry, hurry, hurry”. When I asked why I needed to hurry, she told me the names of some people close to her heart who she was pleading with to hurry and turn to Christ because she wanted to see them again in Heaven. My heart rejoiced to hear my mom, lying on her death bed, still faithfully praying for and proclaiming the gospel to those still lost in their sins.

Today as we celebrate the life of my mom and also mourn her death, I want us all to take a moment and reflect upon our own lives. Are we sure that we will see tomorrow, or will death come as a thief tonight and steal away our breath. If we did die, are we prepared to face the judgement of the Holy God? Would we be found righteous and holy and welcomed into His Kingdom to enjoy an eternity with no tears, pain, guilt, and death? Or would we be found sinful and guilty and therefor cast out into outer darkness where there will be weeping, pain, and gnashing of teeth for all of eternity? I know my mom would call out to you if she could, to Hurry, turn to Christ and live.

My mom has taught me so many things and I am grateful for her love for me and our family, and am also amazed at the way she loved her friends, family, and neighbors. But it is her love for God which not only helped changed my life but I trust will change yours as well. I will miss my mom and I will grieve her death, but I will not lose hope because I still carry with me the memories I have of our time spent together here on earth and also the promise that one day, when my days are through here, then I too will cross over from the temporary pains of this world to the eternal joys of heaven where I will be reunited with my mom and also with my savior and creator. Today if you have doubts or fears for your future, please do not leave without turning to Christ for help. I know that if my mom was here, she too would tell you, “HURRY because He is calling”.

Closing: Thank you for your willingness to come and join with our family as we grieve the passing of my mom and remember the joy she has brought to our lives through her love for others and her love for God. At this time I would like to close with another quote from Charles Spurgeon and then offer an opportunity for anyone else who would like to share with us some memories of Dorothy Lucinda Rutledge.

Spurgeon said, “There is an essential difference between the decease of the godly and the death of the ungodly. Death comes to the ungodly man as a penal infliction, but to the righteous as a summons to his Father's palace. To the sinner it is an execution, to the saint an undressing from his sins and infirmities. Death to the wicked is the King of terrors. Death to the saint is the end of terrors, the commencement of glory.”